11/18/2025
It’s been a difficult season around here, in some ways. It’s also been very beautiful and joyful because we are beyond blessed with each other, and a lovely baby (who recently turned 1!). I hesitate to complain, because I have it so good. So I hope I don’t come off as complaining.. I just want to share some of what’s on my heart. I don’t know if it’s a postpartum thing or what, but I’ve dealt with some depression/anxiety stuff over the past 6-9 months. I’ve also got some autoimmune health things I’m discovering/dealing with so maybe that’s it.. all I know is I haven’t quite felt like myself for a while. It is improving (because of lots of prayer on my part and prayer for me) but I’m definitely not all the way there yet. That’s kind of a long rant, but the point of this post is this: One thing I realized about myself is that I haven’t been allowing myself to slow down and feel the joy. I haven’t been allowing myself to do things that I’ve historically liked to do, because I am always trying to “get ahead”.. or even just dig out from a pile (of dishes, laundry, homeschool, etc etc). I would save things as a reward to motivate myself to keep going, but then never actually feel like I completed the job and then never get to do the fun things. So a month or so ago I decided I need to just have some time where I stop and do fun things, even when the house is a chaos tornado. My daughter recently told me she doesn’t want to be an adult, because then she won’t be excited about things. Talk about a bomb to my heart. I found an Amazon gift card so I decided to buy something fun and crafty, that I definitely don’t have time for right now. I made sure to show her how excited I was to open it and get started on it. All the kids are less than impressed with the progress I’ve made on it, but that is ok. When I needed to pause yesterday, I threw it in a random yarn basket I saw. Today when I got it out, I decided to see what else is in that bin.. and found this fun little crochet houseplant project I finished.. 2 years ago.. and never hung up because I couldn’t find the right spot. This is both fun and sad. So I decided it just needed to go up anywhere, and there we go. 💚